One Good Prank Deserves Another
by Inwe Lothelen
Summary: It’s James Potter’s final year at Hogwarts, and the Marauders intend to go out with a bang! What better way than to start a friendly prank war with a few fellow students? But when James crosses one student, will he finally meet his match?
1. A New Year, a New War

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

Summary: It's James Potter's final year at Hogwarts, and the Marauders intend to go out with a bang! What better way than to start a friendly prank war with a few fellow students? But when James crosses one student, will he finally meet his match?

**One Good Prank Deserves Another**

Chapter One

_A New Year, a New War_

It was their last ride to Hogwarts on the Hogwarts Express, and the Marauders were discussing just how they were going to make it memorable. It was, after all, their final year at school and their final chance to make Hogwarts history for decades to come. As the snack trolley came around the boys loaded up on food for thought and brainstormed how they were going to go out with a bang."

"We could always dangle Snape upside down in his knickers for a good laugh," Sirius Black suggested while eating a chocolate frog.

"No, we've done that before, remember 5th year?" James said, running his hand through his hair while trying to think of something. "It needs to be big, bigger than the Snowball War in 4th year, bigger than our Snape Vendetta in 5th, and much bigger than what we pulled on the Slytherins last year." Everyone grinned at the mention of that, remembering when all that the Slytherin 6th years could say for a whole week was "Gryffindors rule! Slytherins drool!" Of course, the teachers had known that the Marauders had done it (who else out of the 6th year Gryffindors?) and they had received two weeks worth of detentions, but it had been worth it.

"I've got to go to the Prefect's carriage, Prongs. I'll be back in a bit." Remus got up and opened the sliding door, carrying his robes and badge with him.

"I can't believe they let you stay a Prefect after all you've done, Moony," James said, grinning, "I mean, a Prefect who's a Marauder? You get more detentions than the rest of our year put together... not including us, of course."

"I wouldn't if you three would just stay out of trouble!" Remus shot back good naturedly at his three best friends. "I'll see you all later." He closed the door and walked towards the front of the train, various other students walking past as well, all with badges. A few shot the Marauders dirty looks: they created too much work for the Prefects for some of them not to be bad. If they looked too long James would just flash his Head Boy badge at them, and it startled them so much they kept walking without a word.

"Shouldn't you go, too, Prongs?" Peter asked, "You_ are_ Head Boy."

"I would... but I won't," James said, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly. "If they want me, they'll come get me."

"What if we just wrap it all up into one big war, us against all comers? I'd say that's pretty big," Sirius said, looking at the card that came with his frog. "Ptolemy. Already have that one." He threw it on the seat, and Peter picked it up and pocketed it. He didn't have it.

"That's a pretty good idea, Padfoot," James said, an evil glint in his eyes. "A war to end all wars... we'll go down in history! The Marauders, the worst troublemakers Hogwarts has ever, and will ever see!" Sirius looked proud of himself, and Peter was rubbing his hands together like an evil genius, smiling maniacally. "The only question is, who will we prank first?"

The three of them sat for a few minutes in silence, thinking to themselves. Severus would be too normal; hardly a day passed when hexes didn't fly between him and the Marauders. The rest of the Slytherins didn't seem right either. So who would be on the receiving end of the first attack?

Suddenly, as if a Godsend, a girl rapped smartly on the door to their compartment. She was dressed in Gryffindor robes, and had a Head Girl badge flashing brightly on her chest. Her bright red hair was pulled back in a bun, and an infernal fire burnt in her bright green eyes. Oh, she looked angry. Lily Evans pulled open the door and unleashed a rage upon the boys within.

"James Potter, are you Head Boy or are you not? If you don't want the responsibility then give it to someone else. If you intend on actually coming to the Head Meeting, then I suggest you come right now! McGonagall is fuming."

The three Marauders looked at each other, their eyes wide. Comprehension downed on them. She was perfect. "I'll be right out, Lily dear. Unless you want to be a doll and help me change into my robes?" Lily made a sound that sounded like a mix between an angry cat and a dying hippogriff and slammed the door so hard that it jumped right out of its frame and opened again, causing all three boys to jump. With that she stalked away back to the Head Carriage.

"Boys, I think we've found our mark."

James sauntered up the aisles of the train like he owned it, passing the other compartments and playing the crowd. Girls swooned as he walked by, boys called out their greetings of "Hey, Potter! How was your summer hols?" He acknowledged them all like a professional entertainer. When he reached the Prefect Carriage he grinned at Remus as he passed, and Remus shot him a worried glance. After the Prefect was the Head Carriage and he opened the door and walked right in as if he _wasn't_ over a half an hour late.

"Potter!" McGonagall fairly barked, "Where have you been? I hope that this show of tardiness is not a reflection of your future performance as the Head Boy of this school." She sighed, turning away and rubbing her temples, muttering under her breath, "Don't even know why Dumbledore chose in the first place... worst troublemaker in years... off his rocker..."

Lily looked quite proud of herself, and gloated while McGonagall went off on James. It took a good five minutes for the Transfiguration teacher to stop, and at that point she turned back to James and looked at him over the top of her glasses. "I trust that you've written your Transfiguration paper on animagi over the summer?" James grinned cockily and nodded. "Good, well, let's get down to business. You're a good student, Potter, one of the best in Transfiguration; I just wish that you were a bit more responsible at times..."

The Head Meeting went on, mainly a description of duties that seemed to enthrall Lily and bore James to death. It wasn't until McGonagall got to talking about the dances that would be held that year that James became interested.

"Professor Dumbledore has decided that we will hold two dances this year, a Fall Fling and a Spring Serenade."

"Would you care to go with me, Lily dear?" James asked, batting his eyelashes at her innocently.

"I'd rather take the giant squid, Potter," she replied hotly. James grinned and leaned back in his seat. There was nothing more satisfying than annoying Lily Evans. This year would definitely be one to remember.

"You two, along with a few Prefects of your choosing, will have the duty of decorating the Great Hall and getting the word out for the dances. I expect you two to cooperate fully with each other," she gave them both a sharp look, and Lily at least had the sense to look properly ashamed, "Or else there will be consequences. There will also be monthly meetings for you both to attend in the Headmaster's office." She looked up at a clock on the wall. "We will be arriving shortly. I suggest you get back to your seats for now."

James went back to his compartment. Remus had already gotten back; as soon as James had closed the door he played tried to plead with James better judgment. "Prongs, you can't seriously be thinking of pranking Lily Evans. She's Head Girl, for goodness sakes!"

"And I'm Head Boy. What's even better is that she can't take points away from Gryffindor in I'm a bad little boy, because that would be taking points away form herself! It's genius! It can't fail, Moony. Just trust me."

"That's what you said right before we were almost drowned in that girls' bathroom on the third floor," Remus pointed out warily. "I'm just saying, Prongs, Lily is cleverer than we give her credit for."

"That's what makes it so excited! A worthy opponent! Aren't you sick of Snape's half-assed pranks? I'm sure Evans will do a hell of a job trying to keep up with us. We just have to stay one step ahead of her."

The train lurched to a stop and students started filing out. The Marauders followed suit, James and Remus breaking off from the other two to help take the first years across the lake to Hogwarts. "Come on, first years over here! No, you're not going on the bloody carriages, you're going in the boats, come on!"

Remus elbowed James in the ribs. "There are teachers, Prongs, be a little... nicer." The scared eleven year old students followed the Prefects to the lake, and Lily helped them into the boats, being far more courteous towards them than James was. After a rather boring ride up to the castle (the first years seemed much more impressed with the castle than the others were), James, Lily, and the Prefects left the first years with Professor McGonagall and made their way into the Great Hall, sitting with their friends at their respective tables. James and Remus took seats across from Sirius and Peter, and the first years filed in. It was the start of another great year at Hogwarts.

That night in the Gryffindor 7th year boys' dormitories, sleepy from eating so much food, the Marauders plotted their first attack, which would take place the next morning.

"We have Potions first. Should we do it then?" Sirius asked, glancing at his schedule.

James shook his head. "No, no, no. That's Professor Slugborn. Evans is in the Slug Club, remember? If we do it there he might murder us."

"What about Charms?" Remus suggested, having finally given up trying to get the idea out of James' head and going along with the plan. "She's the star student. All eyes will be on her."

"Excellent idea, Moony! When do we have that?"

"After lunch," Peter said, looking over Sirius's shoulder at his schedule. Sirius shrugged him off.

"Ugh, Wormtail, you need a shower or something! You smell like old cheese!" Remus and James laughed, but Peter looked mortified. He was scared to death of being jeered at by James or Sirius, and he slunk out of the dorm to take a late night shower.

"Okay Marauders. We strike tomorrow in Charms! Get a good night's sleep, we'll probably need it to run away form Evans tomorrow.

"After what your planning, James, we'd need more than a good night's sleep to be able to escape tomorrow," Sirius said, a dirty grin on his face.

"Good point, Padfoot. Who has broomsticks?"

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That's the end of the first chapter! I'llupdate as soon as I can, but after the first few chapters it might be a bit of await with school starting up and all. Reviews, both friendly and flames, are always welcome. I hope you enjoyed it! Peace out!

-- Inwe Lothelen


	2. Ecstatic in Charms

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

Author's Note: Thanks for the reviews! Special shout outs to SlytherinFan15, crazylily, and iluvrobbie for reviewing my first chapter and giving me the incentive to write a second! I really do appreciate it, and I hope that everyone likes the second chapter. By the way, if anyone has any ideas for pranks I'd be very grateful and give you credit in my author's note for the idea! Well, without further ado, here it is!

**One Good Prank Deserves Another**

Chapter Two

_Ecstatic in Charms_

For the Marauders, the morning couldn't pass quickly enough. Potions was, as usual, boring. Professor Slughorn was definitely one for playing favorites, and unfortunately the Marauders weren't high on his list of favorite people. After a strict reprimand for adding his powdered wormwood too soon, James Potter was quite happy to get out of there and go to lunch.

"Could have happened to anyone, mate," Sirius consoled, giving James a pat on the back.

"Sure, Padfoot, I'm positive that everyone in our class has blown up a cauldron and coated themselves in a sticky pink goo at least once. It seems perfectly natural to me," James said bitterly, still trying to pick out bits of pink from his hair.

"Perk up, Prongs. Remember Charms class," Remus said, grinning slightly. This earned a small smirk from James.

"Everyone knows their places, right?" James asked. The other three Marauders nodded. Of course, they really only had to sit next to James while he performed the spell. Nonetheless, James had insisted that it was important that they all at least look like they're performing a spell at the same time, that way no one would be sure who cast it and be able to stop them.

Lunch passed uneventfully, and they walked to Charms with an excited feeling in the pits of their stomachs. The war was starting, and Lily Evans was about to experience the most mortifying moment of her life.

"Okay class, now this is the wand motion for the Attacking Charm," Professor Flitwick said, simultaneously showing the class a quick jabbing motion with his wand. "The incantation is 'oppugno'. Now everyone can try the charm on these stuffed animals, since we really don't want anyone to make something potentially dangerous attack another student. You may begin."

At first the class was hectic, as some students missed their targets all together and caused stools, quills, and bottles of ink to attack their classmates. However, about halfway through the class most of the students were bruised, poked, or inked enough to not even be trying the charm anymore. Everyone except for Lily Evans, that is, who was causing a large stuffed dog to repeatedly bash Professor Flitwick in the head, much to his delight.

"Miss Evans, it appears that – oof – you have the concept – oof – quite well!" He exclaimed, his glasses being skewed from the repeated attacks.

Peter looked to Remus, who looked to Sirius, who looked to James. Now was as good a time as ever to pull the prank. All four boys raised their wands as if to practice the spell, but instead James pointed his wand discreetly at Lily Evans, saying the words of the spell in his mind. "Optare amor!" A thin pink jet of light shot out of his wand and hit Lily in her lower abdomen. James turned to his three friends, grinning madly. They all gave him a thumbs up. No one had seen the spell performed, but judging by the sudden scream that had come from Lily's general direction, it was fair to say that the spell had gone off without a hitch.

The entire class suddenly became quiet and turned to look at Lily, who had fallen to the floor. She moved from side to side, moaning so loudly and suggestively that the entire class got to giggling. "What the-" Lily started to say, was unable to finish as a wave of pleasure washed over her nether regions that so intense she was unable to keep herself from screaming and thrashing her legs about.

The whole class suddenly realized what had happened to Lily. She was having an orgasm in the middle of class! This realization caused all of the students to erupt in raucous laughter, and Professor Flitwick, overcome with shock, made no discernable move to quiet them.

The pleasure spell was too much for Lily. Tears started to stream down her face as the contractions she was feeling actually started to hurt. As the spell reached a climax, Lily couldn't help but moan and scream so loudly that she drowned out most of the other students, practically convulsing on the floor. She had never felt so exposed in her entire life, having something so private happen in front of dozens of classmates. If she wasn't crying already from the spell itself, Lily might have cried anyway from sheer embarrassment.

For the Marauders it was as if Christmas had come early. Sirius was cat-calling and whistling, Peter copying everything that he did. Remus looked mildly concerned, but was caught between his two rowdy friends and forced a laugh at some of their uproarious jeers. James, on the other hand, seemed intent on watching Lily, and despite smiling for a job well-done, was subconsciously trying to fight a feeling of arousal himself. Her moans were enough to make half the boys in the class a little uneasy, but James was beyond uneasy, if he would only admit it to himself.

After the climax of the spell Lily had gone limp on the floor, still moaning and sobbing. "Class dismissed!" Professor Flitwick yelled, and with a swish of his wand Lily was lifted into the air, trailing behind a running Flitwick to the hospital ward.

The majority of the class dispersed quickly, going to their dormitories for some time off since class had been let out early. Hushed whispers could be heard throughout the halls, and as other classes came out the news of the prank spread quickly. It was only a matter of time before one of the Marauders was approached about the episode, and it happened that night after classes. A fourth year Gryffindor known for gossip, Kalypso Moritz, approached Sirius.

"You were in that Charms class, weren't you, Sirius?" Kalypso asked, sitting close to Sirius a couch in the Gryffindor common room. Sirius smiled at her and slung an arm around her shoulders.

"Course I was. Now, you can't go spreading this around, Kal, but me and the Marauders... it was our idea!" Her eyes widened and she rewarded the information with a sweet smile. She got up off the couch and, after receiving a conspiratorial wink from Sirius, ran to the other girls to share the news. Remus rushed over, glaring at his flirtatious friend, who seemed unaware.

"Kalypso's a pretty girl, isn't she, Moony? Might ask her to the Fall Fling that James was talking about..."

"You told her that we were responsible for the prank? Moritz is a gossip! It'll be around the school in less than a day!" Sirius laid a calming hand on his shoulder.

"Doesn't matter. Lily is still in the hospital sleeping. I guess the spell wore her out..." Sirius laughed and turned to James, who was staring at the fire from his perch on the cushioned arm of a maroon chair. "What's next, Prongs?"

"Hmmm? What Padfoot?" James asked, shaking his head and turning to Sirius. The two Marauders gave each other a knowing look. James had been distracted all day since Charms, and they knew that he had his eye on Lily Evans as more than a prank victim.

"What's the next prank?"

"Well, I was thinking-"

Remus and Sirius were unable to hear James' new plan until that night, however, as at that moment an extremely pissed off Lily came through the portrait. Suddenly the entire room became awkwardly silent, the other Gryffindors wondering just what Lily's reaction would be now that she wasn't comatose. They weren't disappointed. She strode over to the fireplace in large steps and stood over James, who suddenly wasn't so sure of himself.

"Have a good day, Evans?" He asked, giving her an uneasy grin.

SLAP! Lily hit James right across the face and ran up the stairs to the girls' dormitories. James, still sitting on the armchair, massaged his left cheek and turned to the other Marauders. "Think she figured out who did it?"

Lily sobbed into her pillow. She cursed James' name over and over, placing all of the blame for her embarrassment and pain on him. He was the ringleader after all. James' cronies would never lift a finger without his consent. She heard the door of the seventh year girls' dormitory open and close, and looked up from lying on her four-poster to see Alice Langdon standing in the doorway. "Come on in, Alice," Lily called out miserably before flopping her head back down on her pillow. Alice obliged, and rushed over to Lily's bedside.

"It's not that bad, Lily. The hype will die down in a few days, and no one will remember." She stroked Lily's long red hair soothingly. Lily muttered into her pillow. "What was that, dear? I can't hear you with your face in that pillow."

"I don't want people to forget, I want to get even, more than even! I want the Marauders to rue the day that they dared to mess with Lily Rose Evans!" Lily's eyes blazed with a cold green fire, a spark for revenge. "I'm just not sure how to do it."

Alice smiled, getting an idea in her mind. "Well, what if we could get even? What if we formed out own sort of group to get the Marauders back? I'm in, and I bet that Kathleen, Abby, and Vanessa would be up for it. What do you say? You think it's time for some payback?" Lily sniffled and nodded, trying to wipe away her smeared mascara. Alice smiled. "I'll go get the girls. It's about time those boys learned that they can't expect girls to take something like that lying down. We'll get them as bad as you and worse. They'll wish they never messed with the Gryffindor girls!"

That's the second chapter! The third should be up soon. So it's getting interesting... review with idea for pranks or just constructive criticism or praise. What can I say, I'm a ham . I know I had some errors in the first chapter. I hope I edited all of the errors out of this one! Thanks for continuing to read.

-- Inwe Lothelen


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